Will I See the Sun

Will I see the sun,
Rising above that golden horizon,
Or will my back be turned,
Favoring a man-made shine?
Will I hear the chirps of the birds,
Nature's wake-up call,
Or will my slumber be startled
By clicking metal machines?
Will I smell the roses,
As they bud in the damp April air,
Or will my lungs be filled
With the smog of a concrete jungle?
Will I taste the fresh berries,
Grown in woods nearby,
Or will my mouth be stained
By the flavors of synthetic chemicals?
Will I feel the soft grass underfoot,
The kind that only grows in these parts,
Or will my feet be cut open,
By broken glass and jagged asphalt?
Will I live for my dreams,
Those entwined in the fabric of my being,
Or will I follow the beaten path,
Walked by the fearful and uninspired?
Will I wait for those lips,
That I know fit so perfectly with mine,
Or will I continue to meet with other faces,
Trying to tell myself they're anything like yours?


I wish I knew the words that would bring you here,
Right by my side, maybe even tonight
And I wish knowing what I know would be easier,
But I'm impatient, and a little masochistic, 
So no matter how much my muscles hurt,
I will never drop this weight, 
I might even smile, laugh at the pain,
Self-inflicted but universally present.
My strength comes from knowing it's temporary
Unlike me and you, which I honestly think and feel will last forever,
In some form or another, but the state of matter doesn't matter,
Only it's composition.
I put so much effort into lying to myself
And it hurt, like a joint overextended, 
It was so unnatural. 
I can't do that.
I won't fight what has been put in front of me,
By what some might call an angel.
I always thought I was looking, searching,
But I didn't know for what,
And now I do, 
But it's funny because I found you by accident,
Or maybe it was coincidence, fate, destiny.
Another funny thing is that there's only one you,
And there's only one me.
So anyone who thinks they know how we feel,
Is lying, or impossibly ignorant,
I kind of pity them because what we have is amazing,
Completely irreplaceable, immortal,
And if people caught even a glimpse, 
Oh, they'd be jealous.
I can't call it "love" because everyone else uses that word,
To describe whatever it is they have,
Which can't hold a candle to what we share.
We're so much more than that word can do justice for.
Sometimes I forget
But you remind me
That I am
Good
Worthy
Deserving
Capable
Smart
Strong
Maybe even
Beautiful. 

       You're stuck in my mind, all the time